Who Do I Cry For?

Fifth Sunday of Lent; John 11:1-45

And Jesus wept.

When my father passed away, there was a wide range of emotions that my family all shared. My Dad was a man who had a dry sense of humor and enjoyed crazy jokes. I recall one year when I was young, the men in our neighborhood had a tradition of pranking one of the other neighbors. My Dad was always in on it and enjoyed great joy at the shenanigans. This one year, he realized that none of the other guys had approached him about doing a prank. He realized that he was that year’s target. So after dark, he climbed up on the roof of our one-story house with the garden hose. Sure enough, not long after, the other guys crept towards the house intent on derring-do. Howls of surprise and disbelief filled the neighborhood air that night. And my Dad had a self-satisfied smile that night and for a few weeks after.

So when we were gathered in the Hospice House that final weekend, we found ourselves sharing those kind of stories and more and laughing loudly and happily. Dad was right there in the bed, and although he could not respond, I know he heard us and was chuckling along.

While I had my share of tears to go along with the laughs, the times I cried the hardest were not over Dad. Dad lived out of state, and our children were still here at home with their own families. Availing ourselves to technology, we arranged FaceTime calls for our boys to be able to say goodbye to Grandpa. For me, sitting there and listening to each of our sons thank their grandpa for the many happy memories and lessons learned, was overwhelming. The memory of it still gives me pause.

In this Gospel, that we all know so well, Jesus does not cry over Lazarus. He cries when Mary comes to him and he sees how upset she is at the passing of her brother. In seeing Jesus shedding tears with the two sisters and the other family present, I think of Jesus weeping with me and my family, as we grieved when our dad and grandpa died. Jesus knew our pain and cried with us.

In this Lenten Season, there is much to cry about and for. My heart reaches out to the mourning families and friends of those killed in violent conflicts around the world, especially in Ukraine, Palestine, Sudan, Lebanon, and the war in Iran that is spreading turmoil across the Middle East. I grieve with immigrant families in our own nation who live in fear and whose lives are torn apart by ICE federal actions. I lament for families decimated by gun violence.

I am not one who cries easily, but I cannot be silent or unmoved when I see and feel the pain and suffering happening in my world. I commit to be an agent for change and for love by embracing every person in need I encounter. I will make phone calls, visit my legislators, give smiles, hugs, and appropriate financial aid as I am able. And, when so moved, I will cry with the one who is hurting.

Every Day.

© 2026 by Timothy J. Doppel

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